The Art of Self Greatness

"Gentleness is a sense of goodheartedness toward ourselves."  Pema Chodron

If, as I believe it is, the path to world peace asks first that we each make peace within, surely self-gentleness is a key marker on our personal path. It certainly is for me.  Born with a critical eye, I can almost always see that things need to be different.  Sometimes that manifests as criticism of others.

But often on my personal learning journey it showed up as harsh self-criticism, making myself wrong, beating myself up.  I thought that was a good thing. ‘Hey God, look I notice my shortcomings and ‘own’ them.’  Surely I’d get some credit for admitting that I am less than perfect.  I’m sure God noticed, but whatever ‘credit’ I was given, I’d like to trade in for gentleness chits.

Today my acts of self-aggression are more subtle. They tend to sneak in when I least expect it. For example, I notice while working on a project which gives me pleasure, that I question whether my time would be better spent focusing on marketing or doing something to generate income.  Then, I may let this little voice of monkey mind take over and move me to worry that, if I don’t focus on marketing, I won’t be able to pay the bills and I’ll be embarrassed that  I made the ‘wrong’ choice.  Not so gentle or goodhearted am I?

So, how do I transform guilt ridden ‘shoulda, coulda, woulda’ thoughts?  How do I nurture the art of self-gentleness?  There are three keys:

Be aware and willing to acknowledge my acts of self-aggression without judgment.

Forgive myself and those outside influences that may be ingredients in my worry.

Ask what my heart chooses. Honor the choice.

Practice.

This week my heart has been playfully suggesting that I pause on daily walks to ‘listen’ to the rocks. They’ve inspiring me to stack them. I’m finding it a wonderful way to practice gentleness in nature, and just discovered more about the art of rock balancing.

As we practice gentleness and goodheartedness toward self, what might be possible if we extend that to all others?  A more peace-filled world?  Worry, fear, control, giving way to love, happiness, and the individual self-expression that we are each meant to express?

Experiment for the Week: Notice where you are less than gentle with yourself. Breath in a breath of gratitude for the awareness. Speak the words ‘I forgive me for this act of aggression.’ Take two deep breaths allowing the sense of forgiveness to penetrate your being. Ask ‘what does my heart choose now?’ Honor that choice. Practice, or as a wise sage once said wash, rinse, repeat.

Being Nobody But You

"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else – means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting." - e.e. cummings

These words speak to my heart this day, at this time in my life. Thankfully, I have an independent streak and a tendency to speak and act upon what is true for me in the moment.  Sometimes though I find myself ‘going with the crowd’ (or thinking that I should), perhaps to get along, to be accepted, to do the ‘right thing’, to be secure, etc.   For example, I was about to step over the language of ‘battle’ and ‘fight’ in cumming’s quote.  But, since I’ve noticed that I’ll just say that I long for the day where we learn to express deep sentiment without words grounded in fear and fight (and, that’s a post for another day).

What resonates for me is being at a point in life where I feel like I’m swimming upstream in some domains of life.  I imagine the salmon being its authentic self and swimming upstream in a flow of water that could carry it effortlessly in the opposite direction.  Or this lone tiny sunflower popping through the rocky soil for one last link with the sun before the snow falls.

I’m coming to see some shadow in the well-intended positive thinking and spirituality of today. The world it seems has guided us to simply step into the flow of the external world and let it carry us in whatever direction it does, without running those choices through the filter of our soul.  Without question this approach can have value and take us on adventures we’ve not even dreamed.

But it seems that the world (parents, schools, career counselors, friends, partners, bosses, financial advisors and other well intentioned influences in our lives) teaches us to choose what’s best on the mundane level. All too often the yearning of the soul to expand knowledge into wisdom is left behind.  I hear it in the voices of clients who feel they have no choice but to be there for the ‘security’ of a paycheck. It lurks in lifestyle choices that have us swimming in more stuff than we need, yet wanting more (and not feeling any better when we get that next thing).  I personally experience it in the tension between the system’s definition of what I need to have in a portfolio in order to ‘be secure in my later years’, the lifestyle I choose today, and what I believe about my capacity to contribute and be financially rewarded well into the future (not to mention my dream that we will create new economic systems which are fairer, more just, and honor all contributions to the whole in ways that sustain us all).

That said, I’m grateful for the tension, the seeming disconnect and discomfort that sometimes creeps in. It reminds me that I am awake, awakening, and that the opportunity to create something new from ‘being nobody but me’ is ever present.  Is it any wonder that I live on a road called Cordial Way near its intersection with Rarity Way?

Experiment for the Week: Notice where you experience tension between the logic of the world’s messages and your heart.  If your heart were in charge, what might you choose differently?

Shining Light in Dark Places

Darkness has no power over light; rather light overcomes the darkness.  Ernest Holmes

This is not the post I thought I’d be writing this morning. Rather, it is the one that showed up upon waking and putting pen to paper (yes, that’s how a post starts for me).  I had another focus in mind yesterday, and I fought with myself, asking ‘what does this have to do with success, redefining success, ancient wisdom, The Zone?’

Then, I looked at this piece of art (Circles of Life by lisa knaggs**) as I do every morning. A particular square popped out (lower left with three circles). It’s perhaps not what you expect given what’s come before, but it fits. That’s my aim for this message as well.

Perhaps it’s the government shutdown and political upheaval here in the U.S. coupled with my own personal journey of shining light in the dark spaces of my being, I simply feel abandoned by the systems of our world. Of course, systems of themselves cannot ‘do’ anything. They are operated by we mere mortals, each with our own purpose, agenda, and lessons in this life.

I observe that we have evolved most systems with little regard for what I call their dark side, the shadow, the risks, the seemingly negative impacts and consequences.  And, we have been ‘sold’ on this basis. Take cigarettes for example. The story told was one of not just their safety, but the glamour (for women) or power (for men) that smoking evoked.  Decades and many legal battles later, we finally learn that wasn’t the complete, truthful story.

Today the battle over GMOs in food, the less publicized health risks of electromagnetic pollution*, and our economy and financial systems themselves provide rich ground for shining light into the darkness. From this light, we have the opportunity to choose differently and to create new stories from our new choices.

Just like in our personal lives, cleaning out the basement (for real or metaphorically) requires that we use our energy and our time dedicated to that process.  In order to consider new perspectives we need to shine light on the dark places. We need to expand our knowledge base and look beyond what we are fed daily by the media sources of the system.  As on our spiritual journey where we dig deeper inside, informing ourselves fully asks that we dig wider and deeper outside, to actually search for information to inform ourselves anew.  It seems to me this commitment is a key element on the path to making different choices and creating the new stories so needed today.  Ultimately it is those choices that build in us the wisdom of consciousness that lives infinitely.

Experiment for the Week:  Shine some light on the dark corners of your sources of information. Challenge what you hear/read. Search for new, different, deeper information on an issue of interest.  For example, watch the BBC documentary Century of the Self  (you can find it online with a simple Google search). Discover what it evokes/provokes in you. Share what you discover here (Yes! The comment section of our blog is now open.)

*Full disclosure/shameless promotion: My research (and the concerns I’ve awakened) around the effects of electromagnetic pollution evolved into a business interest offering products that provide protection from these effects. I’ve personally used them for over a year, with noticeable positive impacts on my health and energy. You can check them out here: http://www.giawellness.com/cindycoach/products/terra-gia/. Or, email cindy@successzone.com and I’ll provide links to the information that woke me up on this issue.

** lisa knaggs is a Certified Canine Massage Therapist, Trainer, Behavior Consultant at Relax your Dog™, Chief Visionary Officer at Bark for Peace! in Denver, Colorado.  She was foster mom to Luke, is a fabulous artist, and can be contacted through the Bark for Peace! Facebook page.

What We Need Today Are New Stories

"If you do not change direction, you may end where you are heading." - Lao Tzu

My thoughts this morning are jumbled around this idea of a new story.  The change brought forth by my recent move has evoked inspiration from being back in touch more intimately with sacred land.  Walking this sacred land daily reignited a personal quest to create new stories in my work.  Today, as I share these thoughts, I share too photos of that land that I'm privileged to walk daily.

I’ve come back to the dream that brought me to Crestone five years ago: bringing change leaders to this sacred place to rest, restore, and reinvigorate.  From that renewal, they are fueled to return to the world to birth new stories of possibility for themselves and, perhaps, for others.

My jumble comes from a deep sense that not only do I personally need a new story, but we need to accelerate the pace of creating new stories collectively. We need stories that help us let go of that which no longer works, that which divides and seeks to control.  We need stories that remind us that “right finally dissolves everything opposed to it” as Ernest Holmes wrote.  We need stories about “the world our hearts tell us is possible” [Charles Eisenstein – www.charleseisenstein.net], personally and globally.

Of course, all global stories start personally. Some become widely known – Gandhi, Mandela, King, Bin Laden, Hitler.  But fame or not, ‘good’ or ‘bad’ each of our stories contributes to a collective consciousness that creates the world we experience, personally and globally.

What if we each understood and took responsibility for our role in, for example, the government shutdown, the leaks at Fukushima, the saber rattling conversations and threats of war, acts of war themselves, and the consequences of natural disasters?  What if I truly understood and accepted my role?

So, this week, I’m focused on allowing my new story to emerge. Although I have some sense of urgency, I feel guided to allow rather than force the creation.  I sense that experimenting in a dance between allowing and taking focused, intentional action is part of my personal learning as well as our learning collectively. It’s that dance and looking at how my choices are connected to the whole that I take into the week ahead.  What about you?

Experiment for the Week:  Playfully consider the stories you are living in this week.  What influences inform and inspire those stories?  Capture your inspirations and explore where they take you.

Make No Small Demands

God is forever doing new things and when we conceive new ideas, it is an act of the Divine projecting Itself into creation.  Ernest Holmes, The Science of Mind

This  is not about demanding of others (or even of yourself, other than that you stay true to you), but rather about declaring what you need, expecting your demand to be met, and remaining flexible in how that looks.

Yesterday’s personal journal post was short and clear: “Internet and phone issues continue. Need to get them settled Today”!  By 3pm it was done, and not in a way that  I expected, as I’d been told “we can’t provide service to your location”.

On some level, I don’t think I had accepted their response, but I was implementing another option that proved challenging (frequent resets of the router, restarts of my computer, and inconsistent connection) as my almost last resort (a tad better than driving seven miles to the town coffee shop with wifi).

From time to time during the several week saga, I reflected on what meaning I might give to the situation. And, on how I would need to adapt my work and connection with clients, colleagues, friends.  Am I meant to disconnect for a period? I wondered.  Being a bit on the tenacious side, I rejected that meaning and continued step by step, deciding to add a land line (remember those?) as back-up.

Driving into town to pick up a phone cord left behind in the move, I discovered that I’d left without mail that needed to go to the post office, so turned around to return home to get it.  On the way, I saw the local telephone/internet technician and decided to stop to get more info on why they weren’t able to provide service.  She kindly explained (much better than the customer service rep was able to), then added “but I think there’s a way and I’m working on it”.  What? Really? With a glimmer of hope, but no promise of when or even if the service was possible, I went on my way.

Two hours later, the tech called my cell, “I’ll have your internet installed this afternoon … you’ll just need to call in the order so I can do it.”  It seems she was given the wrong address initially and when she discovered the error from talking with me, easily found a way to get service.  Add another hour, and I’m connected, it’s fast, consistent and no resetting, restarting required.

I’d stumbled onto the solution by forgetting mail, returning to retrieve it, and stopping to get more information.  Despite some angst during the several weeks of not knowing, I didn’t resist and had faith that a perfect solution would emerge (even if ‘perfection’ meant an imperfect connection).  Likewise, I didn’t push or make demands of others.  I simply followed my guidance and stepped into the flow of each day, trusting my demand would be met and that my highest good would be served.

And, that is what success looks like this week.

Experiment for the Week:  Identify something in your life that isn’t working as you would prefer it work. What meaning do you give it?  Release any resistance.  Step into the flow and see where it takes you.

The Will to Focus

Scattered thoughts, like a herd stampeding, go nowhere – fast. Cindy Reinhardt

Focusing our thoughts is the most powerful tool we have. And, yet ‘monkey mind’ often takes over. Dozens of conscious thoughts and countless unconscious ones clutter our personal ‘airwaves’ with static.  Add in a bit of noise from any form of media or an unexpected event and focus is lost.

Lost that is unless we use our will to reign it in like cowboys/girls on horseback (or today on all-terrain vehicles) control a stampede.

I’ve had that opportunity on several occasions recently when unexpected events have popped up in the midst of moving. My scattered thoughts cover the gamut from the list of ‘to do’s’ to the business projects waiting patiently (or not) for attention.  Yesterday’s focus was intended to be resolving the issue of getting internet service to the new home.  Instead, my focus needed to be  marshaled for an emergency trip to the vet and doggie care for Luke (he’s fine, but not pleased that the vet sewed him up with pink stitches).

What I’m discovering is that each unexpected event is an intersection where I have the opportunity to choose how and where to focus my energy.  Only with diligence and awareness is that choice a conscious one of will rather than an automatic response.  Only with that awareness do I have the power of choosing how I will respond rather than allowing a stampede of reactive thoughts to take over. Only with that commitment can I be fully present to what’s in front of me.

As the planet and much of humanity suffer unimaginable destruction, loss and disruption, I’m aware of how minor my interruptions are.  Yet, I believe that it is in learning the power of our thoughts and our focus that we are creating our experience. Through discipline and practice, we can create our world much differently than that current experience.

Experiment for the Week:  Take time this week to notice when you loose your focus to scattered thoughts. What different choice will you make to stop the stampede and focus on what is in front of you?

Self Expression From Me to Me

"Self-expression and self-worth live parallel in the way we deal with ourselves day in and day out." Patrece - www.p-systemsinc.com

Most often, I notice that we think of self-expression as how we express ourselves to others, from me to you or from me into the world.

This week in the midst of moving from one home to another, I find myself noticing how I’m expressing ‘me to me’.  I see that form of self-expression as the foundation of how I feel about me as well as how I relate with and express to others.  I’m noticing how self-satisfied I am with how I’m navigating the move.  Much (perhaps all) of that self-satisfaction comes from the choices I’m making as I walk through this somewhat unexpected interruption to my ‘normal’ life.

I like how I’m expressing me to me.

As I sit here to write, there are four simple measures of success that I’m claiming from this perspective:

• I’m calm and clear about what I can and cannot control. There’s a possibility that my new home is in a “dead zone” where my internet provider (also my VOIP phone service) may not be able to service (they’ve not been able to spot the tower from the roof peak 30 feet off the ground).  I trust  if they can’t, that I’ll find an alternative (though I admit that driving seven miles to a local eatery in the dead of winter is not my alternative of first choice).
• I’m asking for and open to receiving help from others (and oh, so grateful for the abundance of support!).  I’m taking people up on their offers to help rather than being super-woman, do-it-yourselfer.  Today two amazing friends packed up all of my books and the entire kitchen and helped me move two loads of boxes to storage. Did I mention gratitude?
• I’m taking extra-ordinarily good care of myself – getting rest, enjoying walks with the dog, spending time in my garden, and eating well from the bounty of produce.  And, I’m being kind to me, focusing on what I have accomplished, not what didn’t (but ‘should’ have).
• In a week with little business time or attention, I’m honoring my commitment to post and send out my email newsletter.

So, what about you?  How pleased are you with how you are dealing with you, moment to moment, day to day?

Experiment  for the week:  Notice your self-expression ‘you to you’.  Are you calm, clear?  Are you supported? Are you taking care of you? Are you honoring your commitments?

A Special Guest Post

This week I’m excited to introduce Patrece, a wise woman who has investigated and worked with the physics part of meta-physics for more than forty years. She understands the frequency use of energies in such a way that charges our life experiences in practical and meaningful ways during these ever-changing and fast-paced times. I have been “energized” by P Systems’ most recent newsletter that she wrote, and I’ve been granted her permission to share it with you. In lieu of an experiment this week, I’m suggesting that you reflect on their Open-ended question for September.

Energy =Time=Money from www.P-SystemsInc.com

“The degree to which we understand our self-worth is the degree to which money is going to be there.” Patrece

 As if it’s not enough to ask us to learn to navigate the use of energy into time management, we now add money to the earthbound equation of energy = time = money. Use is the issue. Look at it this way. If we buy into the ever-increasing popular concept that we’re all striving to be rich, as in financially wealthy, then we measure our ability and our success, as well as that of others, by how much money is acquired and required. Money, in action, is further acquisition. That’s okay for what it is, but there’s a divergence between acquisition and the metaphysical pursuit of using ourselves without considering resupply.

Those interested in the metaphysical life, and its qualities, accept that we are always in the flow of creativity. In an infinite sense, we grow while holding on to nothing. Then we go out into a world that is mostly dictated to by the rules and forces of money that say, “Acquire and hold; acquire and hold.” The issue becomes one of acquisition and disbursement. The challenge is how to bring together that which we hold on to and that which we are meant to give away while at the same time feeling pretty good about ourselves. The degree to which we understand our self-worth is the degree to which money is going to be there. Self-expression and self-worth live parallel in the way we deal with ourselves day in and day out.  We all know, within ourselves, when we get our minds into complicated situations that drain our energy of self-expression. We also know, within ourselves, what it feels like to honestly express ourselves without comparison to what we think we should be, could be, might be, or even what we used to be.

To harvest the abundance we know is possible, we need to be honestly convinced of exactly what we’re worth and the specific talents we want to use under any circumstance. We need to recognize where we are in the world and how we see ourselves at any given moment. Discovery is our task.  Let the fun begin and, in the process, let’s not ignore the fact that there’s more money than any other manmade thing wherever we go in the world. That’s no mystery. Abundance is everywhere. Let’s be certain that we’re willing and prepared to help ourselves.
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PS open-ended question for September: Would you use your energy and time in the same way if money were not an issue?

The Power of Being Flexible

"Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood and probably will not themselves be realized."  Daniel H. Burnham

I like that. It’s visionary and feeds the part of me that looks forward to the future and what’s possible. Our intentions, like garden seeds, sprout our plans and actions. We reap the harvest.

And yet, can we become too attached, too committed to our plan that we miss other opportunities? The great funny man, Woody Allen is quoted as saying “if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans”.  If Woody is accurate, God is belly laughing with me this week.

I started the week with a clear intention in my journal: complete multiple projects in preparation for launching a newsletter [soon!] and several other Fall business initiatives. Then I prioritized a task list and schedule to do just that.

With clear intention and my plan in place, Monday was great – lots of progress. I felt unstoppable. No-thing would interrupt completing this goal.  No-thing except a phone call letting me know that the house had been sold and I have 30 days to move.

What? That’s NOT my plan!

Choice point. Panic and fall victim to what’s happened and the host of emotions and actions that could evoke? OR, take a breath, ask to see the opportunities the situation presents, get support, shift my focus and priorities for the week, and stand in my power to create what’s next? Gulp. That’s my commitment.

My higher intention is to “step into the unknown, trusting that my intention and actions will create the solution I desire or, perhaps, something better that I haven’t yet imagined”. I started from this commitment. Then, created a list of the ideal next house and situation that I wanted. Next, action.

The results? As I write this post, I’m finalizing details to move into the next perfect place. It was offered by a friend somewhat unexpectedly (although I once had a vision of  living there).  Better yet, a great approach to one of the projects I’m committed to finishing will add ease to a tedious task!

The lessons? Stepping into our power requires first a clear choice to do just that.  Our choice is followed by planning; action, while being flexible; and willingness to let answers emerge. This week that’s how I’m creating my Success Zone.  What about you?

Experiment for the Week:  Develop  your ‘flexible muscle’. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart and take a few deep breaths, breathing down to your feet and allowing the breaths to ground you.  Do so until you feel relaxed AND very stable – like nothing could take you off center.  Imagine you are seaweed deeply rooted in the ocean floor – nothing can uproot you.  Now, begin to sway gently & slowly from side to side keeping your feet firmly planted (you might imagine a fish bumping you and responding with movement of all of you except your feet).  Now sway forward, backward.  How far can you sway without moving your feet?  This practice will support you in being flexible when the fish and big waves of life bring unexpected motion. I practiced it daily years ago during a particularly stressful time when I needed to be firm, stable and flexible. It continues to serve me well when I need to shift.

The Power of Your Potential

“Today we are involved in major planetary change. We are being pressured and tested to our personal limits by Universal forces. Each of us has the potential of gaining great spiritual awareness and advancement in these times, but to do so we need to understand our potential.” Gregge Tiffen

In keeping with my promise to go beyond the mundane here at Success Zone, this week’s focus is on potential. Not the mundane potential of accomplishing goals in the ‘real’ world, but rather the innate potential that we each have as spiritual beings on the planet.

It’s no accident that I’m writing this at a time when I’ve made the personal commitment to fully live into my power. Gulp.  Right on time, I’m presented with multiple opportunities to experiment with just that. For example, the sweet home that I rent just went on the market. Do I simply rush out and find another place, or wait until it sells and then take whatever I can find in this small community with few rentals? Or, do I feel into what seems ‘right’ for me, ask for guidance, and step into the unknown, trusting that my intention and the actions that follow will create the solution I desire or, perhaps, something better that I haven’t yet imagined?

I’m choosing the later, to deeply trust that my next right place will be revealed. After all, that’s how I came to be in this beautiful, quiet mountain community of Crestone, Colorado, seven years ago. But that’s a story for another day.  For now, let’s look at potential from the perspective that it is in YOU.  Potential is not in a job, a project, or anything outside of you. If you see potential existing outside of yourself, you may be well served by reconsidering where it truly resides.

Think about that: Where does potential reside? Where do I place it in my thoughts, words, and actions?

The root of potential is potent, “having authority or power, mighty, influential, powerful”. So, when we place potential in anything outside of ourselves, we give it (whether person, place, or thing) our power. Hmmm … have you ever considered this possibility?

We come to this life with spiritual power that has been granted us on a Universal level.  That power resides in us as potential to the extent that we are aware of it. We must also be willing and able to call our potential forth and to trust that the source of our power is not the world, but rather an omnipotent force that the world as we know it is a part of.

Our job is to direct this potential, this energy for our benefit, not just in mundane matters, but in matters of consciousness and the soul. To look beyond the mundane to matters such as our learning and growth and the everlasting wisdom that comes with learning at this level.

I’m coming to see that important choices start here with claiming this gift of power that we have been given. Will I allow a situation, another person, what our culture expects, or anything outside of me to have power over my well-being, my joy, or the conditions in my life?  Or, will I seize each event as an opportunity to step into my power as a co-creator in my life?  What will be possible when we make that choice consciously FIRST before any other?

I’m discovering personally that stepping fully into my potential is not a journey for the faint of heart. In a world where we have (mostly unconsciously) given our power to education systems, families, jobs, well-meaning friends, consumerism, and, yes, even religion, reclaiming our power requires courage, tenacity, and commitment.  But isn’t that just what being in the Success Zone is all about?

Experiment for the Week:   Observe your choices for action this week, noticing what actions come from the guidance of your creative power and which ones you may have taken on from something outside of you.  No judgment. No right or wrong. Simply observation, possibly followed by a new choice.  Have fun!