Life Flows

A beautiful, soft morning across the San Luis Valley to start my day.

We are part of a natural flow of experiences in which all that we are really doing is allowing ourselves to participate in the flow.  Gregge Tiffen in Deeds are Fruit, Words are Leaves (October, 2008)

Events, many unexpected, seem to show up right on time to benefit me in some way.  I’m learning to trust more deeply that natural flow.  Beneficial events aren’t just those that feel good or bring me pleasure. Especially when I look back, I can clearly see how challenging, unpleasant events brought growth.

I don’t always get to that perspective immediately. When I do, I’m able to meet the event with curiosity, gratitude, and (hopefully) a modicum of grace.  It’s humbling and gratifying to remember that I and I alone choose how to walk through life’s events.

And, so do you. Life flows and we choose how to participate. As I prepared to participate in a somatics course this week (graciously offered by two awesome colleagues and Newfield Network), I was reminded that life flows in all directions. To paraphrase master somatics teacher, Stuart Heller:

Life flows up and Life flows down. Life flows forward and Life flows back. Life flows in and Life flows out. Life flows right and Life flows left.

Stop for a moment and let that sink in.  Better yet, stand up and move in each direction: up, down, forward, back, in, out, left, right.

Life flows out. The course and the flow reminder were just in time for me to demonstrate the power of how we walk (and sit) through life’s events to a coaching client who was trying to figure out how to broach a sensitive topic with a team member. As we explored possibilities, I suggested that she shift how she was sitting. After shifting from sitting on the edge of her chair and leaning forward to occupying the whole seat, leaning back and opening her chest, she discovered a new range of language was possible to engage in the conversation.  

Life flows in. Recently I’ve received several surprise presents that made my heart smile.

Warning signs sometimes flow into life to wake us up.

Life flows down. An issue with my health presented the opportunity to explore the depth of my conviction about my body’s ability to, with proper support, heal itself.  As I scheduled acupuncture appointments, body work, drank my herbs, adjusted my eating habits, I realized a missing ingredient: bringing my belief and my intention consciously and clearly into the process.

Life flows up. So, I’m creating a new practice to engage all of me in the healing process.

Life flows back.  As the bed & breakfast high season winds down and winter is on the horizon, I found myself experiencing some angst about money and completing the ‘get ready for winter’ list of household tasks. I needed to gently guide my thoughts to a track other than worry.

Life flows forward. Within a couple days of putting my attention on remembering that ‘all my needs are met’, I received a phone call from a woman needed temporary housing. We created an agreement that meets both of our financial requirements. In addition, she’s helping with the winter chores (a good thing as temps are dropping and we could be graced with our first snow soon) AND caring for Luke and our home while I travel next week.

Life flows. Stop for a moment and look at the events in your life over the past week. What do you notice?  How do you feel?  How are you meeting life’s flow, especially when its direction may not be exactly what you thought it would be?

Winter's white blanket is edging our way.

The Challenge of Independence

A Road Less Traveled ...

It is a crucial requirement that each of us become an independent thinker an independent person as an aware consciousness. Gregge Tiffen (The Language of A Mystic: Innovation - October, 2009)

Those who know me, would likely agree that I’m fiercely independent.  A leader in the coaching community once labelled me a ‘contrarian’ (I would wear the badge proudly). And, some of you might be smiling or shaking your head in agreement about now.

This week though I’ve begun exploring independence from its opposite: dependence. The exploration comes forth from this musing in my journal in a couple days ago:

If the truth of lack is abundance, how can truth be applied to the budget of the local water district where I serve on the board? How can I apply this truth more powerfully to my own finances?

The vast San Luis Valley reminds me that abundance is the truth.

Warning: you won’t find the answers in this post.  I’m still in the exploration.  I have more questions than answers (and, that’s a good thing!).  What I’ve come to see (in a BFO – blinding flash of the obvious) is that independent thinking leading to innovation requires experimentation.  In our culture, we’ve erected numerous barriers … dependencies, if you will … to truly independent thinking and the action that follows. 

These dependencies create a complex web that is often ignored. Take for example being dependent on a job (or having enough clients) for money to meet the needs of self and family. Or, in the case of public agencies like the water district, being dependent on generating sufficient revenue to pay the costs to keep each tap flowing. The complexity encompasses not just the issues on the surface, but a dependency that values knowing, order, and getting things right over curiosity, experimentation, and possibly needing to make course corrections.

Dependencies are embedded deep in our culture from systems and life experience. In school, we learned that good grades come giving ‘right’ answers. We carry this forward to careers, jobs, businesses, institutions – praising what’s ‘right’, condemning what isn’t – our dependency on being accepted and approved trumping our willingness to experiment, learn, grow, change and, yes, be alone in taking our stand.

Now that I see the challenge more clearly, what new possibilities will emerge? What would an innovative approach to public finance and a budget shortfall look like from the perspective of knowing that abundance (not lack and its associated fears) is a universal truth – that there is always enough?  What conversation can open that door?  What dependencies and pre-conceived ideas must I let go of to invite and engage the conversation?  How will I tap into the courage to do just that?

Yep, more questions than answers. I’ll let you know what emerges in the weeks ahead. Meanwhile, what are you dependent upon that is in the way of living the independent life you were designed to live?

Morning light and the Zigguraut never fail to offer just what I need ... calm, inspiration, beauty (and the list goes on).

The Gift of Resistance (Take 2)

Will there be snow on the peaks tomorrow?

"Challenge your resistance or resist your challenge."

"You become a part of your own excitement when you recognize that you living your life is you being revealed to you." 

Gregge Tiffen [The Great Pumpkin: Was Charlie Brown Right? – October, 2007]

As often happens I didn’t start this post with the idea of busting a meme, yet in a BFO (blinding flash of the obvious) during our morning walk, I saw that indeed I am challenging the conventional wisdom which says that ‘challenging resistance means doing what it is I/you are resisting’.  Au contraire.

Challenging resistance doesn’t necessarily mean doing something I’m having a reaction to, avoiding, or wanting to run away from.  Rather, it means recognizing my reaction as resistance. That requires being aware of and willing to name what I’m experiencing as resistance, followed by questioning to discover the source of that resistance and what gift it has to offer.

Resistance has crossed my path several in several experiences recently. First was the idea that when I declare that I ‘don’t know’ or don’t have access to the information that would guide me to know, I’m resisting. That’s an idea that I’m still working on.

Then, in a course that I signed up for mostly to earn credits toward renewing my coaching credential next year, although I was intrigued by and thought I ‘should’ (ugh!) do it,  I noticed I was reacting to being taught. ‘I already know this’. This doesn’t apply to me, because I’m (blah, blah, blah). Without an intention to learn, I quickly moved to what I might call arrogant boredom. I grumbled my way through the first two lessons, not taking time to be aware that I was resisting and to reflect on that awareness.

I also found myself reacting to a post from someone I follow on social media. As she pontificated on being beyond about how she’d grown and others who hadn’t (blah, blah, blah), I was turned off, tuned out, and I felt made wrong. More ugh! And with those ‘ughs’, I noticed opportunity to explore and reflect.

Enter reading the booklet that’s the source of this week’s quotes.  I paused, took a breath, named and owned my resistance. As I opened, I allowed the resistance to inform me and to guide me to choose again. In one situation, I’m in the process of shifting my resistance to curiosity and exploring how to incorporate the content on my terms. In the other, I’m simply letting go, declaring that there’s no right/wrong, good/bad, rather understanding that my beliefs are not aligned with the ideas being put forth.

Through recognizing and owning my resistance, I gained new insight into me and discovered the gift of challenging resistance: new knowledge; knowledge that is both useful in the moment and becomes wisdom to carry forward on my sojourn – in this life and beyond.

Yes!  Morning brings the season's first dusting on the peaks ... and

A cheerful bluebird that reminds me to smile!

Catch A Falling Leaf

The hills are alive enroute to Cochetopa Pass

Life is an enormous power to be understood and used as energy.  Gregge Tiffen (Open Secrets: Ancient Rituals October, 2011)*

In the last few weeks we’ve experienced a solar eclipse, the autumnal equinox (here in the northern hemisphere), and this week’s spectacular eclipse of the super, harvest moon.  Each event had its own power. Each of us experienced the events in our own way, unique to us and understood at our own level of awareness, knowledge and interest.

As we move into autumn with daylight waning day to day on our way to the quiet, inner time of winter, we approach the season of celebration: harvest festivals and the holy days of many religions.  As the leaves are providing their annual show of fall color, I move into my annual preparation for winter and I’m reminded of the energy of connecting with the earth, her cycles and of rituals that emerged from observation.

In ancient times, holy days were truly holy. The people stopped. They celebrated and, perhaps sometimes recalibrated, to be in sync with the planet. They observed. They interpreted. They sought to understand the energy of events and to use that energy.  It seems that they understood intention and the power of the mind in ways that science today is proving. From their understanding rituals emerged.

Happy dog pausing to pose on the trail ... 'come on Mom!'

A drive high into the mountains to immerse myself in the beauty of the turning leaves reminded me of a ritual that Gregge Tiffen wrote about in the booklet that today’s quote comes from: catching a falling leaf. A falling leaf “represents the goodness of Mother Earth,” thus good luck emanates from catching one before it hits the ground. It is said that in ancient times wise women sent the children out to do just that. The caught leaf is carried until the end of the season and disposed of at the Winter Solstice.

Catching a falling leaf is not as easy as you’d think. My car ‘caught’ one that floated in the window. I have yet to catch mine.

I think of rituals as habits or practices that I do with awareness, intention and a sense of sacredness. We create ritual when we bring purpose and a sense of the sacred into life whether catching a leaf each autumn for good luck or blessing our food daily for gratitude and good health.

The pass -- an historic place to steep in nature's beauty.

Swimming in the Sea of Thought

It's hard to imagine that sometimes I walk with little awareness of the beauty I am so blessed to live in.

In an all intelligent universe, a thinking universe, there’s a total thought process as a permeating thought force thinking all the time. Perhaps we don’t think at all but, as one cell of the universe, we individualize the thought process. We isolate a moment in infinity. This provides us with two avenues: one avenue is total omnipotence and the other avenue is individualization that is part of total omnipotence that each of us takes and identifies individually.  Gregge Tiffen (Open Secrets: One Original Thought  - September, 2011)

As I begin writing this morning, I’m desiring to complete my post efficiently so that I can indulge in watching Pope Francis address Congress and then discover just how silly our elected officials and those who are running for office can be in their post event pandering.

I wasn’t thinking that the Pope and his visit would be a part of my post. Yet, as I reflected on the above quote, I realized that in watching a bit of the pageantry yesterday I’d observed someone who danced seamlessly between, perhaps who has the capacity to merge, those two avenues: omnipotence and individualization. In my observation,   the Pope would seem to be that omnipotence (or, perhaps, to have it flowing through him) as he looked, wide angle, seeing and blessing all.  The next moment he had a laser focus on a single individual and his interaction with that person.

Of course I can’t know what Pope Francis was experiencing, but I sensed that he was totally present in each and every moment. And, I saw the joy that seems to bring him. Joy that I too know when I am totally present, especially present in the beauty of nature.

That observation brings me back to my experience this week, where I’ve been observing my thoughts and noticing patterns that don’t serve me.  I tend to dwell on events (especially those that weren’t as I desired them to be), carrying them and overworking them in my head. I think about what I might have said or done differently and replay that scenario, not once or twice, but over and over.  I’m reminded that I have a choice and that I, and I alone, can stop the cycle and direct my thoughts differently.

I’ve also noticed some ‘monkey mind’. You know, flitting from thought to thought with no focus, intention or clarity. They flow just like scenes from multiple movies strung together with no story line.  They’re exhausting.  And, totally within my (response)ability to manage.

In awe of the beauty and vastness of the San Luis Valley - my view when I'm not looking at the mountains. More gratitude!

I’ve been practicing just that on my morning walks, putting attention on a single sense with the intention of creating awareness of just that.  On a crisp morning, I may start with the feel of the cool air on my face and try to keep my attention there.  I say ‘try to’, because I notice just how easily mind wanders. Sometimes I have the presence to gently nudge it back quickly. Other times this awareness comes more slowly.  Practice is the key to deepening my awareness and sharpening my ability to make mindful choices as I individualize each moment in the infinity that is life.

A post speech note: I find much to reflect on in this Pope’s message, perhaps fodder for a future post. Color me grateful. And, Luke would like to let you know "I'm back!"  We've navigated and eliminated the itch and he's back on duty as the official greeter here at Dragonfly House.

Happy for the healing!

A Thought Never Dies

Hints of Fall Begin to Dot the Slopes

Every thought we have and every word we speak goes out into this infinite Universe and stays there. Every thought we have has an effect on us and our planet as well.  Gregge Tiffen [Life in the World Hereafter: The Journey Continues & The Journey Continues: In Search of Wisdom – September 2010]

The above quotes got my attention this morning as they were what my eyes landed on in each of the two books I picked up as I began to muse about today’s post.  I wondered just what the heck they had to do with an event this week that I’ve been reflecting on and guessed that I’d be writing about.

Last week I wrote about the need for forgiveness to forge peace.  Other than questioning the level of my own courage to forgive, my reflections were more global.  Said another way, they were more about the world and others than developing my own capacity to forgive.

As is the way of learning, the issue was brought home to me this week in one of those ‘small events of life’ that generated deep reflection and questioning: a conundrum, as yet with no clear ‘answer’.  An unresolved conflict between what I claim my values to be and choices I make that aren’t aligned with them. I’m grateful for the curiosity which inspires me to explore and want to sort it out.

This idea that a thought never dies that it goes forth into the Universe forever has my attention in this internal conflict.  You see, for all my thoughts of peace breaking out all over the world, I experience being annoyed by and being concerned about the impact on me and my environment by some of nature’s creatures. I call them ‘pests’: mosquitos and mice to name two specifically.

I aim not to give them much energy or attention. But sometimes they demand it.  During mosquito season, my inner killer came forth daily as dozens would follow me or guests in the door. Without much thought I swatted them. Dead.  Months before, after experiencing an infestation of mice that I was unable to control by natural means, I made the difficult decision to use poison.  Unlike mosquito swatting, I made a conscious choice.

I had the awareness that this choice wasn’t aligned with my claim to value non-violence and peace. While it’s been successful in reducing the mouse population, I’ve never been totally at peace.  It isn’t what I want to contribute or how I want to express myself in the world. Every choice is after all an expression of me.  Yet, I rationalize my decision with the success of not hearing mice scurrying in the walls.  

Enter this weekend, a larger creature.  In the dark of the night, it took bites out of every piece of fruit in my two fruit bowls and knocked several items off of the kitchen counter.  Other ‘evidence’ clearly indicated that it wasn’t a mouse. While I was definitely upset, my thoughts didn’t go to ‘kill it’.  And, as I reached out for advice on dealing with the situation, the clearest was to “set a live trap”.   That action was a success, and a rascally young pack rat has been relocated to a remote area several miles away and, hopefully, its point of entry sealed: a small victory for non-violence and for own thought process.

Compassion for the Perpetrator

Although I’m keenly aware that my thinking and my choice contribute to negativity on the planet and to our human propensity toward violence against one another, I’m not at the place of reversing my mouse control decision.  The angst and curiosity of the conundrum will continue at least for a while.

A Beautiful Path for Strolling Contemplation

The Courage of Forgiveness

A Stunning Sky to Start the Day

Non-violence is the natural outgrowth of the law of forgiveness and love. Paramhansa Yogananda

Forgiveness is the might of the mighty.  Mohandas Gandhi

I come to this day’s post with hope that my country is shifting its foreign policy focus away from the tolls of war and toward peace.  My thoughts come in the wake of the energy of children visiting here at Dragonfly House this week and the energy of innocence that they live in, in awareness of the anniversary tomorrow of ‘9/11’, and in gratitude for the brave world leaders who endeavor to bring peace via an arms treaty with Iran.  They come as well with gratitude for those who work for peace in many ways – moment to moment, day to day.

I wonder what depth of courage would be required in order for forgiveness to become our might, our power, our strength.  Rather, what would it take to recognize that in forgiveness, not in weapons, is where true strength lies?

My truth in this moment is that I don’t know. It’s easy to talk of peace and forgiveness from afar, from my ‘ivory tower’ nestled in the peaceful woods of the Rocky Mountains.  It’s easy to be for peace from this place.

But what if I had been more directly impacted by the events of September 11, 2001?  What if I were facing a violent threat in this moment?  Would have the courage to stand in forgiveness of the ones committing this act?

My experience of forgiveness in life is of less violent events than these. And, forgiveness didn’t come in the moment. I needed time to get to the place where I could forgive. I needed to experience anger, indignation, and a sense that I needed to fight back.  I needed to understand that ‘fighting back’ had no return and that there was no getting even. 

Even though I’ve had that experience, I doubt that I have the capacity bring forgiveness forward instantly.  But that doesn’t stop me from wondering, from dreaming ‘what if I did?’  Indeed, it propels me to wonder what if we all had the ‘courage of forgiveness’?  What if world leaders engaged in conversation, negotiation, leadership from this ‘might’ not the might of the sword?  What if …?

Mountain Majesty

Back to School/Back to Joy

Early Morning Orbs at the Ziggurat

If we are to live in joy and in accomplishment, we must release our cells from self-imposed restrictions so they can sense, interpret and move us with the changing times. We need to be ready to respond and to use our experiences to our advantage.  Gregge Tiffen (What You Should Get From Education - 2007

It’s ‘back to school’ week here in the Sangres. This morning’s quote provided me with the ‘back to school’ jolt I needed to recognize that I’d fallen into a pattern of rote response to daily events. No joy. No awareness of using those events to my advantage.

Fortunately ‘back to school’ didn’t require pre-school shopping and scurrying around (plenty of the later just tending to life). I simply needed to STOP, breathe, recognize and reset.  I stopped early yesterday, putting my head on the pillow before darkness fell.  I wasn’t aware just what that stopping would bring, and after a few deep breaths of gratitude, I was fast asleep.

It was only when I hit the books this morning for the spark of inspiration to kick off this week’s post that I took the time to recognize (and acknowledge) that I was slogging through events each day.  I was ‘getting things done’ and in the doing I was more focused on what needed to be done next than on the activity at hand.

I wasn’t miserable, but I definitely felt stressed. And, where there is stress, there is no joy and little, if any true accomplishment. Yes, tasks get done, but without the awareness needed for the experience to bring forth any wisdom. Unknowingly, I’d stepped back into some old ways, rotely responding to Luke’s needs, my garden’s call to ‘come harvest’, preparing meals, running my B&B, attending a county commissioner’s meeting, and a host of other ‘to dos’.  The quote above woke me up to that awareness with the recognition that I was moving through life with a sense of dread.

So this day (and probably several that follow) is dedicated to resetting and getting me back in tune.  I started on our morning walk, putting my attention on feeling the cool air, smelling the freshness, and hearing the quiet of early morning in this beautiful place.  I set aside the ‘to do’ list and stayed present, allowing the beauty of the day to envelope me. I returned home, interacted with a departing guest, cared for Luke and then took myself out on the deck with a nourishing bowl of fruit and cup of tea. 

I took some time to reflect on this process of ‘resetting’ and outlined what I wanted to commit to in this reset:

·        Take time as each task is complete to recognize the accomplishment.

·        Step into each task with joy and gratitude.

·        Keep my attention on the task at hand, not ‘what’s next’.

·        Take care of me – rest and nourishment when I need them (not when I have time for them).

I’m clear that the return to my old ways of moving through each day put me out of sync with the current patterns of the Universe and of me. Perhaps that’s true on such a broad scale that the world is in ever increasing chaos.  What if we each checked our settings regularly to ensure that we are in tune? What kind of world would we create if we simply took time to stop, breathe, recognize, and reset?

The Tree of Joy and Wisdom!

Leave of Absence

“Animals are here as companions and stabilizers. Having a direct connection to the earth, they serve the important function of being able to ground and stabilize our energies by taking our excess energy and feeding it back to the earth. They – along with plants – absorb a lot of negative energy. As we nurture and care for them, they leave us calmer in the midst of our sometimes chaotic incarnate experience. ”

— Gregge Tiffen (Life in the World Hereafter: The Journey Continues)

A mid-summer trip to the Great Sand Dunes nearby. 

No I’m taking ‘leave’ from this weekly post. It is, after all, one of my sweetest ‘to dos’, and I treasure the process and the energy each and every week.  Luke, however, is on leave from one his very favorite things:  official greeter here at Dragonfly House.  It seems that something zapped his immune system, and he is in allergy hell and the likelihood that he’s also contracted tiny mites.

In the midst of keeping a number of important balls in the air, ‘Lukie care’ has been a primary activity over the last several weeks. In addition to our vet recommended medication, I’ve chosen to direct a fair amount of energy to his care. A naturopath friend guided me in creating a protocol to ease his discomfort and move the healing along more quickly. The energy of giving that care, plus being watchful to intervene when he scratches, licks or bites has deepened my appreciation for all caregivers and the for the caregiver in each of us.

His condition and the care that I’m giving have given me pause for reflection and taken me back to Gregge Tiffen’s writing about our relationship to nature. 

In my reflection, I’m deeply aware of how calming my time caring for Luke has become.  I say ‘has become’, because in the first week, I was feeling frantic and overwhelmed (not the energy I would choose to bring to healing). Luke though, ever the teacher, is his ever calm, ever steady self.  He lies peacefully as I apply homemade essential oil ointment. He doesn’t fight being in the ‘cone zone’.  He’s a true model of trusting and receiving.

Cool Hand Luke Skywalker continues to teach me new lessons in patience and love.  While he may be healing and on leave from his job as ‘Chief Welcoming Officer’, Luke and all the animals are always on duty as an element of nature in service to humankind.  Our world is more perfect than we know and, perhaps, than we have the capacity to accept.  And, I am grateful for their service.

Life in the 'Cone Zone'.

In League With The Angels

“In effect, negative levels of earth consciousness will contribute to defeating the positive levels of non-physical consciousness. In other words, when we have someone who is nasty or when we get depressed, we are in league with the devil. Gregge Tiffen (Do The Angels Take A Vacation? – August, 2007)”

The simple beauty of early morning's haze.

My coach recently shared the fun she had after a momentary panic when she discovered that her computer had been hacked. She was writing away in the wee hours of the morning when suddenly a message popped up to ‘call this number immediately for assistance’.  She called and after paying a fee for the assistance, realized that she’d been had. Rather than trekking the path most of us would likely choose (anger, fear, etc.), she played along, not letting on that she was onto their scam.  While she was getting her computer repaired by a legitimate techie, she took advantage of the 24/7 help that she’d paid for, and called the scammers with questions at all hours of the night.

When she shared this story, I could hear the lightness in voice and feel it in her spirit. Complete absence of feeling like a victim. Her response was much like I imagine the Dali Lama responds when things don’t go exactly as planned on this path.  It was good for a laugh and a reminder to, if you will, take the high road.  (I don’t know about you, but I need that reminder quite frequently.)

I confess: I’m not there consistently regarding current events in my life.  In the last few weeks as I’ve been immersed in concern for and care of Luke (summer allergies and a weakened system seem to have left him vulnerable to mites or some other canine biting critters); along with leading my community in opposition to a marijuana growing operation in our neighborhood and hosting guests in the B&B’s busiest month of the year, I’ve needed to be vigilant to maintain my positivity.

I don’t do so just for my own sake (although life does flow much more easily when I’m in that place), but also as a contribution to the well-being of our planet. I’ve come to understand that we are always contributing to the atmosphere.  I want contribute positively, especially at this time when positivity seems quite needed.

Stories remind me not to take myself and the events in my life too gravely.  Quiet time for reflection opens me to listen for the guidance ever present no matter what opportunities life presents. Being in nature demonstrates to me that being alive is a process and that change is constant. 

These in turn lead me back to my core conviction that my life (indeed all life) is unfolding perfectly for my (our) learning.  I’m reminded as well that, like my coach, I alone am at the helm, choosing how and where to use my energy each moment, each day.

When I choose with anger and fear, I choose to be the victim, in league with the devil’s negativity. When I choose with compassion, love, and grace I see challenges as opportunities to experiment, to create, to learn and grow. I may even get to express me in some new way.

The world would have us believe that only those who do ‘big’ things make a difference. Not so.  Moment to moment, step by step, choice to choice each of us is contributing to the atmosphere on our dear planet earth.  She needs us to make uplifting, positive choices. How will I contribute today? What about you?