The Importance of Knowing You Are Enough

“I exist as I am, that is enough,
If no other in the world be aware I sit content,
And if each and all be aware I sit content.
One world is aware, and by the far the largest to me, and that is myself,
And whether I come to my own today or in ten thousand or ten million years,
I can cheerfully take it now, or with equal cheerfulness, I can wait.” - Walt Whitman

If you look beneath the surface of last weeks’ I Am Enough message (or most any of my posts), I hope that you’ll consistently find the theme of transformation. As I explore ancient wisdom and the idea of creating new measures of success, I’m aiming to evoke (or perhaps to provoke) personal transformation at the deep level that has the power to change our world.

Knowing that I am (and you are) enough is just such a fundamental shift. It requires that we find the place within that knows this Truth, embrace it deeply, and nurture this knowing like we nurture our children, our precious relationships, and our gardens. That is the essence of self-love.

When our foundation is self-love, self-acceptance, knowing that we are enough, we make choices grounded in love and cooperation, not fear and competition.

We need more choices made from that place inside as our contributions to being the change that has the potential to shift mass consciousness. Only when we fully embrace that we are enough can we accept that those who make different choices, come from different cultures, etc. are enough as well. Knowing that you are enough builds the courage to embrace differences across the street, in our families, our communities, and in cultures around the world.

When we know that we are enough, we don’t need to prove our worth by spending more to have more stuff. When we know we are enough we can give and serve and do work in the world that contributes to building one another up rather than tearing down those with whom we differ. When we know that we are enough, we experience the reality of Oneness, that we are each a tiny, yet integral, part of the entire Universe.

Knowing deeply within that I’m enough is a measure of success that is not of the world. It’s an inside job and only I, and each of us individually, have the power to claim this mark for ourselves.

Coming to deeply know that I am enough requires stamina and courage and the will to cast out beliefs, stories, habits, systems, and people in life who bring me down. It requires practice and puts me squarely in the driver’s seat of my personal power, the power to choose my thoughts, my words, and my actions as reflections of me and for me.

Experiment for the Week:  Strengthen your ‘enough’ muscle by noticing thoughts or feelings that don’t support this knowing. Then, use your will to choose differently.

Enough! I am. You are. Really.

In a world that challenges us to be, do and have more, I find that I sometimes forget that I am enough.  That leads me to question, doubt and into the stuck places I wrote about last week. The power of simply declaring ‘I am enough’ is one way to jump-start myself.

As individuals in a culture of stress, I believe it is wise to reflect on just what embracing our ‘enoughness’ means.  We have accomplished much in life. We continue to do so. We’ll likely continue that process.  Our accomplishments, our possessions, our good deeds are not what make us enough.  There is a peace that comes with knowing deeply that you are enough.

I learned this at a time in my life when I worked in an organization that, in my experience, always demanded more.  Sound familiar?  I hear frequently from clients in organizations large and small. I hear it from parents, teachers, managers, business owners, community leaders, sometimes even myself, all feeling that we 'should' be able to do more.

I was gifted with the declaration below as I started my journey to knowing that I’m enough.

I AM ENOUGH

I am a human being.

I am only a human being. 

I am not superman or superwoman. 

I am not perfect.  

Perfection is a fantasy only good for producing suffering. 

I don’t have to superman or superwoman, no matter what my voices say.

Human beings are finite, 

And, so am I. 

We can’t know everything, do everything, and don’t have forever. 

I am finite,

And, I accept my finitude with dignity and gratitude, 

I am grateful to be human.

The voice whispering in my ear ‘you are not enough’ is just a ghost, 

An echo of a past moment trapped in my body.

I have made the mistake of listening to the ghost as though it tells the truth. 

But it speaks only an old judgmental story, 

With no care for me.

But I have grown up.

 Have my own voice, My own contentment.

When the echoes speak, I will speak my contentment with my own voice, 

And, accept that I am human,

And that is enough.

I have virtues

And, I have vices.

I have competences

And I have incompetences –

Like any other human being.

But I can make offers

I can make requests

I can make promises

I can have ambition

And I can move with others to create,

To create a future

And to live with dignity.

Life is going to do whatever life does

And it doesn’t care

About my assessment of it.

So it is time to have acceptance.

To accept life.

To accept myself.

And to center myself in my commitment

And in my care.

That’s the life of a human being.

Not a superman or superwoman.

I accept myself

I declare satisfaction for being human

I declare

I AM ENOUGH.

Thanks to life.  Amen.

©2002, 2004 Robert Dunham. Enterprise Performance. 

With deep gratitude to the author Bob Dunham for sharing this at a time years ago when I needed it most. You can discover more about Bob’s leadership work here:  http://www.generativeleadership.co/

Moving Past My Stuckness

"An emotional block is excess energy being stored. We know it is there when we want to do something and we don't do it."  Patrece Powers (www.p-systemsinc.com)

Many thoughts swimming in the pool of creating focus for this week’s topic.  I sensed a common thread and finally ‘it’ appeared, relating as it always does to what I’m experiencing, questioning, or aiming to create in life. I name that ‘support from a friendly universe’. Hence, sharing this place that I get to where I stop and what that place is teaching me, is today’s muse.

The Place.  It starts with a hesitation around some step that seems so easy and clear when I planned it. I feel confused, afraid. Definitely I experience excess energy that I’m not channeling in a direction that moves me forward. Ouch!

The Pattern(s).  Over the years I’ve developed several approaches. I beat myself up for not doing what I ‘should’ do (additional ouch!).  I tell myself ‘it must not be quite the right time or the universe would support me to get do it’ (gotta love that – give my responsibility to the universe! – delayed ouch!). Occasionally, I ‘force’ myself to take the step without any joy and no awareness of using my power to choose (not so ‘ouchy’, but the results rarely meet what I’m aiming for). I might even ask, half-heartedly and with no intention of discovering what I can learn, ‘what’s stopping me?’ (sort of taking responsibility, but not really – delayed ouch!).

The Results.  Honestly, I have a darn good life for which I am very grateful.  And, there are some gaps that I need to own without guilt or self-blame. It’s around those gaps and my stories about them that I become most deeply stuck.   I believe what I have the opportunity to learn in this domain can only make life better (much less ouch, both self-imposed and that gifted to me by the friendly universe and expanded possibilities for what I manifest in the world).

The (not so) New Awareness.  As with so much in life, the insight is not entirely new.  I can make the conscious choice to stop and become consciously aware of what I know.  On some level, I know what the emotional block is.  Each time I feel stuck, when stored energy begins to feel like what I imagine being in a pressure cooker feels like, I have the opportunity to allow what I know to come into my conscious awareness.  While I may experience a momentary ‘ouch’ from what’s there to discover, the long term comfort of stepping honestly into self-awareness and the future choices that are sure to present themselves from that willingness seem, in this moment, to be well worth it.

Experiment for the Week:  What’s your experience with being stuck this week?  Hop over the blog and share your discovery [SHORTLINK]

New Year New Beginnings New Measurement

"There is not just one world available to you. There is another world, and you have the power to choose where you wish to reside."  Gregge Tiffen

As the new calendar year 2014 begins and the light returns, I’m filled with awe at the possibilities that present themselves not just daily, but moment to moment to deepen my knowledge by using what I know to live more fully into being the creative force in my own life that I am designed to be.

The Solstice marks the beginning of a new cycle for the planet and the turning of the calendar to another January 1 signals the beginning of new cycles in business and other aspects of life. Each are convenient times to create our own personal new beginnings. These are times, especially the start of a new calendar year, when our culture and our systems support us to make changes, to begin again.  We evaluate where we are in our health, our wealth, our well-being. Then, we set goals to give us focus and guide the choices that we make about what action to take next.  For the most part these goals are of the world we have come to accept as ‘real’, the one in which we have placed our quest for happiness, for health, wealth and well-being.

While these goals may bring us achievement, they don’t measure our personal progress in consciousness, the knowledge that becomes wisdom that goes with us when we leave this body behind.  While they may bring satisfaction for a period of time, soon after we celebrate the accomplishment, we hop back on the hamster wheel of life, challenged by this world to go for ‘more’.  The world we’ve come to call the ‘real’ world has no concrete, stable standards. Its rules change. Thus, one day we ‘win’; the next we ‘loose’, regardless of what we’ve done.

I’m not suggesting that we are victims of this world that we’ve made real, but rather that we look beyond AND within for a different world. A world where the way things operate never changes, although how we use the operating manual is a laboratory for growth. I’m suggesting that we discover additional measures to anchor us in a world with ever changing expectations.  To create these measures for myself, here are the questions that I’m considering:

• What am I here to learn?
• What qualities in my life do I choose to more fully develop?
• How well do I see everything in life as opportunity?
• How strong is my belief in the personal power that I have been given?
• How well am I using my capacity to live in the world without becoming of it?

As I launched my part in this new year, I trekked to the top of the Ziggurat … to give thanks for life and the natural beauty that abounds and to choose which world I will inhabit and depend on in the coming year.

As you launch yourself into this new year … whether diving off the high dive into the deep or gentle entering one step at a time, I invite you to join me in creating new measurements as a part of your new beginnings.

Experiment for the Week:  As you kick off the new year, review your goals and look deeply into each one. What deeper measures of success do you see?

The Gift of Solstice

"All of heaven and all of earth coordinate at the Winter Solstice." - Gregge Tiffen*

Winter Solstice is the time of natural transformation, newness that comes forth with or without our awareness. Winter Solstice is the time when our receptivity is heightened in consciousness. Is it any wonder that with fewer hours of daylight, we are drawn inside into our homes, perhaps under the covers, and definitely drawn to be inside ourselves at this time of year?

Solstice is the birthday of the Planet and was celebrated as such with reverence and respect in ancient times by our ancestors who lived in close harmony with the Planet’s rhythms.

Solstice is the time of completion and of new beginnings. The old cycle (year) is done. We are presented with the opportunity to declare completion and move on with awareness of the seed of newness that is planted inside. A new ‘you’ with its potential to bring wondrous change in the cycle ahead is ready, provided you are willing to claim it.

In keeping with my understanding of ancient traditions, I take time at Solstice to create a personal ‘silent night’, a time harmonize my rhythms to those of the Planet, to with love and gratitude let go of everything from the year behind, and to acknowledge the seed of newness inside.  And, I invite you to take a few moments or even a few hours to create your own and to acknowledge and embrace the potential of the newness in you.

Start by harmonizing with nature. If you're blessed as I am to live in nature’s beauty, take a walk. Observe and honor the rhythms of nature, whether the slow steady growth of a tree or the daily cycles of ocean tides.  If nature is not outside your door, then sit quietly and imagine your favorite place in nature. Feel yourself in that place. Allow those rhythms to bring you the quiet peace of the season.

Next, create an atmosphere and attitude of gratefulness and let go of everything that has come to you in the cycle ending. Your aim is to empty and prepare a space for the new. Thus, let go of not only what doesn’t serve or suit you, of those things you consider ‘wrong’ or ‘bad’, but of everything: every attitude, your wants and desires, your fears, your hopes, your stories about the events of the year ending, the people in your life.

Finally, when you are ready (perhaps after only a few moments, perhaps a few hours), evoke the sound of newness with the declaration “I am new”.  This is the place where heaven and earth come together in you, as you. The new you is ready to meet, greet and receive the gifts of the new cycle.

May the blessings of your unique newness follow you into and throughout the new year.

*My understanding and celebration of Solstice, while it is my own interpretation, comes primarily from the work of Gregge Tiffen. You can learn more about Gregge’s work at www.g-systems.com. And, you can purchase from his collected works, including his telling of Winter Solstice – The Christmas Story, at http://www.p-systemsinc.com/publications.htm.

10 Days of Solstice

“Become totally empty; Quiet the restlessness of the mind; Only then will you witness everything unfolding from emptiness.”  Lao Tzu

In a noisy, full world, I wonder how it would be to live from the place of allowing everything to emerge from emptiness.  I wonder not just how it would be, but how I might create this experience more often in my life.  And, I dream about the world we will co-create as more of us take this path.

In a noisy, full world, it’s no wonder that emptiness has a bad rap. “Emptiness as a human condition is a sense of generalized boredom, social alienation and apathy,” says the Wikipedia article on the topic, highlighting emptiness as a “negative, unwanted” condition.

This Western view seems to ignore that, on some level, all creation starts from emptiness.  A great novel starts with a blank computer screen (or piece of paper).  Great art starts from a blank canvas.  A fabulous soup starts with an empty soup pot. The planet was formed in emptiness at precisely the right place and the right time.

Okay, it’s quite a leap from a blank canvas to the formation of our home, planet Earth.  But at this time of Solstice, I’m reminded that this is a time to celebrate the birth of the planet. In the deep stillness, quiet, and dark of winter, I’m choosing emptiness as a focal point of my celebration.

Inspired by the ’21 Days of Gratitude’ that thousands participated in last month on Facebook and wanting to acknowledge the Winter Solstice as something more than a moment on the calendar, I’m creating a personal ’10 Days of Solstice’.  And, I invite you to join me by creating yours.

I feel a call to honor this precious time of darkness before the light begins to return. I feel a deep desire to be in the quiet that nature provides during this season, and use her as a guide on my own path.  I sense that this is exactly what I need at this juncture in life.

No, I’m not totally unplugging and going into isolation. However, today 10 days from the December 21 Solstice, I’m committing to practice at least a few minutes of emptiness consciously and intentionally every day.

I want to deepen my experience of what emerges from my unique ‘mirror of the universe’.  That is the blank screen/canvas/soup pot from which I begin.  What about you?

Experiment for the Week: Take a few moments of quiet each day to let go of the noise and fullness of life. How does it feel? What possibilities emerge?

Grateful for my Buts

Wherever you’ve added the word “but”, you have given yourself a major handle to identify what you are depending upon. Patrece on behalf of P-Systems, www.P-SystemsInc.com

A few weeks back, inspired by this quote in a lesson from the weekly series “The ABC’s of Awareness”,  I began to experiment with the idea of how the habit of using the word ‘but’ reveals dependency.

I’ve come to see ‘but’ as yet another clue to where we abdicate our personal power and step outside of the Universal law of independence.  From this awareness, we can step more fully back into our power to act (and interact) independently, which after all is our nature and our responsibility.

So, I began (and continue) to notice my ‘buts’, to consider what they reveal, and to explore what different, independent choices I have the opportunity to make:

• I feel strongly guided to stop, be quiet, read, listen, but I need to (walk the dog, work on my website, make calls; that is, to do those things expected in business).
• I want to develop this aspect of my business, but I don’t like how others approach it.
• I want to travel to Costa Rica in February, but I can’t afford it.

I’m grateful for discovering what my ‘buts’ reveal:  I’m depending on being fulfilled by completing a ‘to do’ list, what other people think, and (one we all know well) money. There’s something powerful about noticing and acknowledging this.  Now let’s look at the choices I have from this awareness:

• I choose to do the things on my list because I’m committed to consistent action in my business. OR, I choose honor this guidance to stop, be quiet, listen and trust that I will also take care of the other activities that need my attention. OR, I gather my energy and organize my time to choose both.
• I notice my dependence on what others do and think and let it go, choosing to simply take the approach and action that is consistent with my design. OR, I choose not to develop this business.
• I make the commitment to travel to Costa Rica, including the commitment to manifest the needed funds. OR, I decide that going to Costa Rica at this time isn’t in my best interest financially.

You probably notice that there’s not a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ choice. Simply, I have the choice to choose, observe the results, and choose again.  As I deepen this practice, I notice that when I articulate my choice clearly I feel empowered and supported in the direction I’ve chosen.  When I simply do one or the other, without declaring a clear choice, I feel a nagging angst, often wishing I was (or thinking I should be) doing the other.

Experiment for the Week:  Notice your own use of the word ‘but’ as well as where you hear it in your interactions with others.  What does it reveal you are depending upon? What opportunities does it present for choosing differently?

The Gift of Receiving

“My source is Universal. I do not depend upon anyone or anything to give me my abundance. My requirements are fulfilled when I look to the Universe to provide. I KEEP MY VISION CLEAR. Abundance flows from the Universal cornucopia. It contains ALL that I need and more. It falls to me like a spring rain. It covers me with its good and fills my life with plenty. I look to the Universe for my support.”  Gregge Tiffen [www.g-systems.com]

To our detriment, we have been taught that it is ‘more blessed to give than to receive’.  If you hold this belief, consider how it may be blocking the flow of Universal good into your life.  Consider as well that giving thanks requires that we first open to receiving.

Receiving and giving thanks are integral parts of creating.  While much is written about the benefits of feeling and expressing gratitude, we have yet to fully acknowledge and practice receiving as a key in the equation for creating personal success.  What might be possible when we fully open to receive?  Stepping into our individual power and uniqueness to create a world that works for all.

What habits do we have that block the flow of Universal wisdom, love, beauty, joy, happiness … everything?  Look first to simple actions of declining to receive.  I used to think that independence meant doing it all myself, “No, thank you, I don’t need … I’ll just do it myself.”   Many of us are masters at this one.

Yet, consider that, not only is it exhausting to do it all solo, but also in taking this approach we are damming up Universal flow.  When I reflect on my own erroneous thinking (I don’t deserve, receiving help will make me dependent, etc.) behind being the Lone Ranger (even he had Tonto and Silver!), I see the possibility that receiving from others on this level opens me to receive this Universal bounty more fully.

And, heck, isn’t the inspiration to give a part of Universal flow? In being willing to receive, I create the opportunity for another to give.

Just this week I had the opportunity to choose between ‘DIY’ (do it yourself) or receiving support to dig out from two feet of snow.  I chose both.  Knowing it would take a long while for my neighbor to arrive with the snow plow, I shoveled a path to the garage to retrieve snowshoes so I could take a walk with Luke in the beauty.  I could have shoveled all day and forged a path for the car, but I opened to receive and as night was falling, my neighbor arrived with his plow.

Unconscious habits of thought keep us from stepping up to this Universal cornucopia.  “I can’t.” “I don’t have.” “I wish …”.  As, I bring awareness to my own habits of thinking, I see opportunities to deepen that awareness and use it to shift my thinking, to create a new habit.  Wishing and putting attention on what I don’t have, simply magnifies that lack.  Focusing on what I do have and giving thanks magnifies that.

For my learning to open fully to receive the bounty of Universal source, I bow in gratitude.

Experiment for the Week:  Open to receive the gifts of life more fully. From the door someone opens for you to the gentle (or not so gentle) nudge of the Universe with an idea, receive and give thanks.

The Gift of Angst

“Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray.”  Jalal ad-Dīn Muhammad Rumi

Angst: a strong feeling of being worried or nervous; a feeling of anxiety about your life or situation.

I don’t necessarily experience angst as a ‘strong’ feeling. Its intensity seems to vary depending on the issue.  Regardless of its strength in a particular moment, I’m coming to appreciate angst’s gifts and to be grateful for its presence.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t wish to live in a perpetual state of angst.  It can drag me into the depths of despair and feel colder and darker than the mountain snow storm just outside my window.

On the other hand, I don’t deny angst entry when it visits.  Rather I’m learning to acknowledge and welcome the sense of unease and invite angst to share what gifts are hidden beneath its surface. I’m learning that angst can light my way toward peace. It shows me where I care. It shows me where I need to adjust.

As I observe angst more deeply, I notice that it has no home when I’m in that place of deep knowing and trust.  Angst doesn’t follow thoughts or choices that are aligned with who I am and what I love. The presence of angst is a wake-up call, an indicator that love, faith, trust are missing and that my thinking, my clarity, my convictions and the actions that follow need to shift.

I’ve experienced angst recently around money, or more specifically a gap between what’s coming in and what’s going out. Yes, I know, it’s a crowded room. And, I believe that it will serve humanity when we each walk outside, take a few deep breaths to get back into our skin, into our true nature, and look at our needs from a new perspective. That’s a gift of angst. Its gentle nudges like these shadows on the Great Sand Dunes remind me when I go astray, or try to follow the crowd, or act as if I’m someone other than who I am.

When I am fully present, angst represents a crossroad, a choice. Will I take its invitation to go to that quiet place within? Will I muster the courage to “be drawn by the strange pull …”? Will I examine where my thoughts are inconsistent with what I believe to be true about the goodness of the Universe?   Or, will I follow the path that the world suggests is ‘practical’ and ‘what I should do in the current situation?

Experiment for the Week:  Notice where you experience the gentle nudges of angst this week. Thank them for reminding you of the choice they represent to return to who you are.

One Size Does Not Fit All

“One size does not fit all.”  Frank Zappa

That’s an interesting quote from an artist whose band released an album ‘One Size Fits All’. Even more interesting, it’s the only quote that I found on this perspective. Lots of quotes supporting the idea that ‘one size fits all’ though.

I’m not totally clear what brought OSFA (one size fits all) to my mind and heart this week as my reflections and practices on individuality continue.  I’m sensitive to things that claim to be “The” solution (answer, path, etc.) whether to prevent or cure cancer, bring forth the love of my life, boost my energy or be the path to everlasting abundance and happiness.  I’m on a personal quest to more deeply understand and live fully into my uniqueness.  After all, that’s what I believe life is about: each of us discovering our part in the mystery and living that part fully. (What a beautiful world we’re creating as we do so!). Yet, sometimes I feel caught between the two, the world that claims to have the right answers and my commitment to ‘be me’. (Smile as I remember my college dorm mother suggesting that Frank Sinatra’s ‘I Gotta Be Me’ should be my theme song. It was definitely hers.)

In that tension are some juicy questions and experiences.  As I try to distill them into a single theme, two words – courage and faith – emerge.  Both are key ingredients, requirements really, for living in alignment with who we are.  It takes courage in the face of experiencing a slowdown in business to say ‘no’ to an opportunity that would bring cash in the door, yet simply does not feel right.  I want my courage to be grounded in faith that instinct and intuition (demonstrations of connection to Source) are more powerful and accurate than information presented by others as ‘fact’.  (Sometimes though, it may be simply grounded me being a contrarian.)

Definitely there are paths, cures, even clothing that fit for many, even millions. But nothing is a fit for all. We are each unique individuals with unique cellular makeup. We each need to navigate and make decisions through different experiences so that we can successfully fulfill our sojourn in this life and move peacefully to whatever is next on our soul’s journey.

As we make the thousands of choices daily about what to wear, to eat, to think, to do and more, let us practice doing so from that place inside that deeply knows what ‘size’ fits us. Let’s discover the world we can create from that place.

Exercise for the Week:  Reflect on this: where in life are you navigating with the courage and faith it takes to be true to you? Honor yourself for taking each leap of faith whether it seems great or small.