Spiraling Kindness

Cool Hand Luke Skywalker (2008-Aug 1, 2019) in the Labyrinth

Practice random acts of kindness and senseless beauty. Anne Herbert

Kindness is top of mind and heart this blustery, snowy morning in the sacred Sangre de Cristo mountains. I’ve been spiraling through numerous thoughts and stories about kindness since last evening. Muse seeming to go happily along wherever the journey leads, including sidetracking to talk briefly with a visiting friend. ‘Hey, we could even simply share random quotes about kindness …’, Muse suggests.

Oh Muse, I like that. The day moving from wind and clouds to sun back to more clouds to blowing snow seems random in a way. This day I notice my own thoughts and energy following that pattern.

That individually and collectively our world would benefit from more expressions of kindness is so obvious that I wonder why the words land on the page. ‘Reminders,’ offers Muse. ‘Everyone needs a reminder from time to time,’ adding ‘and, intention. What if kindness was intentional not simply random?’

Hmm…, seeds of kindness spread randomly with intention. How might that spiral through our lives, our world, our planet home? The idea aligns with, perhaps flows from, seeds planted earlier this week, acknowledging a new moon cycle on Monday. Walking the labyrinth with the intention of planting seeds of peace, love, joy, I found the varieties of seeds growing as I walked and gently chanted. Each time I chanted ‘peace, love, joy’ a new seed presented itself to be added to the mix: courage, gratitude, curiosity, laughter, and kindness among them.

I felt myself planting these seeds anew in the garden of my heart, in the spirit of these woods, and in the consciousness of the fields of activity where I put attention. Today intentional kindness seems to be rising to the top of where I’m guided to focus my choices, my deeds.

That’s not surprising as this week I’ve experienced two seemingly random stories of kindness that loom large in my awareness. It seems not so random that each touched my heart and has stayed with me. One was a friend’s beautiful story about rescuing a turtle that was on a heavily travelled road and a later encounter with the person whose pet that turtle is. The depth of my friend’s kindness didn’t surprise me, rather it served as a beautiful example of the magic that flows when we follow guidance as we receive it.

There is a kindness that dwells deep down in things; it presides everywhere, often in the places we least expect. The world can be harsh and negative, but if we remain generous and patient, kindness inevitably reveals itself. John O’Donohue

Kindness in the midst of heavy traffic. No question that would serve humanity well.

My second powerful encounter with kindness brought home how we simply don’t know how our kindness will land, the impact it will have. In this case it was my own, a choice in 2010 to open my home to a young canine, Cool Hand Luke Skywalker. If you’ve been reading for a while, Luke was sometimes front and center of a weekly Zone or Pivot post. For me he was that kind of teacher. He crossed the rainbow bridge in 2019, but often seems present as I walk through life. While I knew that he was beloved by all who met him, this week, another friend’s story of her encounters with Luke Skywalker first while he was still a vibrant physical presence in my home and later when she encountered him in service to others in the etheric realm, poignantly reminded me that all our choices seed the future. Not just our individual future, but our futures collectively.

With every choice me make, with every thought we think, with every word we speak WE are seeding the future. This is our power.

The steps we take now make new earth grow beneath our feet. The steps we take now decide what kind of earth that will be. In every moment we have the choice to find the fight or to make delight. We have power. Anne Herbert & Margaret Paloma Pavel (Random Acts of Kindness & Senseless Beauty)

As I’ve reflected on kindness since hearing these stories, it seems clear to me that intention supports us in touching the kindness that dwells deep within, a natural part of our design and our being. While most, if not all of us, would never intend to be unkind, do we intend to express kindness in life? Do I?

Be kind. Be connected. Be unafraid. Rivera Sun

Let’s spiral kindness randomly, intentionally, individually, collectively in all that we do. I’m intending a world of kindness. What about you?

P.S. Did you know that February 17 is Random Acts of Kindness Day every year? A little late this year, but already on my calendar for 2024!

Nurturing Compassion

A Road Less Travelled - No Speedsters and Dust Here

Be kind and forgiving to everything and everyone, including yourself, at all times without exception. Dr. David R. Hawkins (Power vs. Force)

One morning earlier this week as I sat by a warming fire in the pre-dawn quiet, a single word eased into my awareness:  compassion.

Wondering if Muse was aiming for an early start on the blog, I was curious that nothing framed the word. No question. No thought about it. No instruction or idea that I ‘should’ feel compassion for someone or something. Simply the word, compassion.

As I sat with the word for a bit, I began to wonder how compassion feels in the body. Putting attention on my heart, I began to imagine each breath coming from my heart. I frequently practice this heart coherence breathing, summoning feelings of gratitude, appreciation, care, each of which generate their own sense of peace, calm, and inner warmth.

Mind (‘not to be confused with me’, chimes in Muse) said ‘surely compassion should feel like these.’ But no feeling came. Nothing good or bad. Just emptiness, an opening for discovery.

On our morning walk a short while later, I was (‘yet again!’ chimes in Muse once more) triggered by someone speeding along the dirt road, kicking up clouds of dust. Guiding Zadie Byrd and myself off the road, I released my automatic outburst – a ‘what’s your rush? snarl’, then admonished myself for not being more patient. Done with that, we continued our walk, my attention on Zadie Byrd and the morning’s exquisite autumn beauty.

But awareness of my habitual reaction didn’t fade as such incidents usually do. Perhaps ‘compassion’ had something to say… (‘Ya think?’ says Muse whose humor is in high gear today.)

‘Just what is compassion?’, I wondered settling in to explore. Merriam-Webster tells me that compassion is sympathetic consciousness (awareness) of others’ distress with a desire to alleviate it (“Compassion.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/compassion.).

Exploring further I learned that compassion is a 14th century word that shares some of its etymology with the word ‘patient’. Hmmm…patience as an element of compassion. ‘Now we’re getting to it,’ Muse suggests: a path to nurturing compassion, to inviting her to live more fully in and express through me.

Compassion beyond the shared sense of concern for a friend’s health or wellbeing. Compassion beyond the care that comes forth when someone close is grieving a loss. Compassion beyond caring for those in the path of war, violence, poverty, and social injustice. These are the places we are likely to feel compassion even when we don’t see the ‘how’ of alleviating the distress we witness. Compassion that flows so naturally that perhaps I take it for granted, assuming that I truly know enough to care.

As I write this, I feel the superficiality that may sometimes rest in my so-called compassion. I’m challenged to look beyond, to explore compassion (or its absence) in those domains where I find myself annoyed, impatient. Compassion for those with whom I disagree. How can compassion coexist with our differences? How does judgement get in the way of true compassion?

For isn’t this the ultimate nature of Oneness, of living in the nonduality that is the true nature of our Being? Of the Universe? And wouldn’t living in and from THAT reality generate the kind of world we would choose to live in?

Like gratitude and other higher states of being, compassion strengthens from nurturing over time with the practice of principles such as this suggested by Dr. David R. Hawkins in his seminal book Power vs. Force:

Be kind and forgiving to everything and everyone, including yourself, at all times without exception.

Thinking back to the speeding motorist and other ‘annoyances’, I’m reminded of these words from His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama:

A truly compassionate attitude toward others does not change even if they behave negatively or hurt you.

As I prepare for an afternoon walk, I’m guessing that I’ll have the opportunity to practice calling forth a truly compassionate attitude.

Webs of Life in the Woods Out Back

Making Life a Sacred Journey of Nonviolence

Neighborhood Street Signs Make Me Smile!

Fighting, cheating, and bullying have trapped us in our present situation; now we need training in new practices to find a way out. It may seem impractical and idealistic, but we have no alternative to compassion, recognizing human value and the oneness of humanity.  The Dalai Lama (2/3/21 quote from Pace e Bene Nonviolence Services Nonviolent Life: Daily Inspiration for Your Nonviolent Journey – more info here)

Compassion, human value, the oneness of humanity. These qualities sum up for me the first five days of the Gandhi King Season for Nonviolence which began on January 30, the anniversary of Gandhi’s assassination and ends on April 4, the anniversary of the assassination of Martin Luther King. I’m engaging in awareness of each day’s theme in my life with the intention of erasing tendencies I have toward violence. You can find the themes here and here.

Day 1 on Saturday seemed to appear out of nowhere. Could it really be the end of January already? Yes, and now February is well underway. The theme for Day 1 was courage, a necessary ingredient in nonviolence. The day’s message offered a deepened felt sense of unity with all that is. Oneness. I am a part of everything. Everything is a part of me. Everything we think, say, do matters.

When you discover that everyone is contained in you and you are contained in everyone, you have realized the unity of life … Then you are not just a person; you have become a beneficial force. (From AGNT’s daily mediation Day 1).

This is BEing the change I wish to see in the world. Simple to envision. Not so easy for most of us to live moment to moment, day to day from this place. Courage is needed to buck the violence in our culture and to break the arc toward violence of the habits I’ve developed along the way: seemingly small, yet costly, negative reactions to some of what crosses my path in the course of a day: a snap judgement about something or someone in the news or a post on social media; impatience with Zadie Byrd when she wants to stop and sniff and I want to keep going. Recognizing that these are acts of violence (toward myself more than others) is a sacred act.

Life’s events are just that: sacred acts giving us the sovereign choice of how we will react or respond. When I take a walk with Zadie as a sacred act of care for both of us, my impatience wanes. My teacher Zadie Byrd, like Cool Hand Luke before her, reminds me in her own way to ‘stop and smell the pines’ (no roses here in the woods you know!).

Recognizing Zadie Byrd as one of my teachers in nonviolence, brought a smile to my face on Day 2 when the theme was smiling. I chuckled as I realized that my impatience is the place where my experience of the peace of nonviolence ends. My life-long learning of tolerance – a key to experiencing the truth of unity – continues! Thich Nhat Hanh reminds us:

If in our daily life, we can smile … not only we, but everyone will profit from it. This is the most basic kind of peace work.

Everything we do matters. A smile from the heart is a sacred act of nonviolence. Smile!

The ‘season’ continued with Day 3’s theme, appreciation, which flowed easily from the awareness of Days 1 and 2. It reminded me that appreciation is one of the keys to heart coherence. Day 4, caring, offered a reminder of the importance of self-care as a demonstration of nonviolence.

Today is Day 5, believing, and poses the question: what do I believe about nonviolence? Do I believe that each moment of tolerance and patience, every smile (masked or not!), every experience of unity and connection matter, and that care for myself and others are sacred acts toward creating a culture of nonviolence? I do. I believe that is true for each of us. We can do this! Indeed we must.

Teacher Zadie Byrd Rolling in the Snow - Also Makes Me Smile!

Pivoting to the Feminine

The Beauty and Softness of a Winter Morning

Western women will save the world. His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

Several threads woven through my week focus on the idea, the necessity really, of integrating feminine principles and energy fully into our culture. Wikipedia lists the following as traits of the feminine:  nurturance, sensitivity, sweetness, supportiveness, gentleness, warmth, passivity, cooperativeness, expressiveness, modesty, humility, empathy, affection, tenderness, and being emotional, kind, helpful, devoted, and understanding. Who among us would not agree that more expressions of these qualities will make the world a better place?

Women as well as expressions of these principles were, from my perspective, front and center in both the Inauguration of President Biden last week and in the new President’s first week of executive actions and his communication with we the people.  I found that refreshing, inspiring, and hopeful.

His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama is famously quoted for saying that 'Western women would save the world' at the Vancouver Peace Summit in 2009. He went on to say "Some people may call me a feminist...But we need more effort to promote basic human values — human compassion, human affection. And in that respect, females have more sensitivity for others' pain and suffering."

Those words came to mind instantly when Alice Walker’s poem 'Calling All Grand Mothers' published in 2010 landed in my inbox, giving further voice to the urgency of this pivot. 

Calling All Grand Mothers

We have to live
differently
 
or we
will die
in the same
 
old ways.
 
Therefore
I call on all Grand Mothers
everywhere
on the planet
to rise
and take your place
in the leadership
of the world ….

You can read the rest of this timely, poignant poem from Hard Times Require Furious Dancing here:

The feminine is not solely about what we DO, but rather how and who we BE.  It is not about gender or sexual preference. Men, women, LGBT, straight, all of us have access to the energy that is feminine. 

It is about the perspectives we hold in life and the beliefs and actions that follow. A few days ago a Facebook post shared by a friend related a conversation between two men talking over a beer. One got up saying he was going to go 'wash the dishes'. The other seemed surprised and said "I don't help my wife." The man going to wash the dishes replied that he wasn't 'helping his wife', that he lived in the home and had a responsibility to participate in its care. That represents collaboration, cooperation, empathy and so many other feminine principles in action!

A deep knowing that ‘we have to live differently’ has long been a theme running through these weekly muses and my life in general.  I often ask myself ‘what do I need to shift to be a better partner on and to the planet?’.  Powerfully weaving more feminine threads into my expressions of life seems to be an element of the answer. Join me?

Zadie Byrd’s New Friend

Courage for Our Time

A Visual Feast Every Day

It takes more courage to dig deep in the dark corners of your own soul and the back alleys of your society than it does for a soldier to fight on the battlefield. William Butler Yeats (Oct 13, 2020 - This Nonviolent Life: Daily Inspiration for Your Nonviolent Journey from Pace e Bene Nonviolence Service)

When I read this quote it seemed to both echo and expand last week’s musing about true power. It reflects much of what we are witnessing in the collective move to look more deeply at history and understand the dark side of our so-called progress. To do so requires courage, especially in the face of resistance, sometimes armed and violent.

Likewise, it reflects the personal courage that I’m discovering I need to look in the ‘dark corners’ of my lifestyle and habits of consumption where their true cost is revealed.  It takes courage to dare wonder about the cost of my choices and to ask who is paying the price of my choices.

These are the kinds of questions that present themselves as I explore the territory of greater awareness in spending and investing choices searching for avenues that are more fully aligned with what I claim are my values. And, wondering if I have the courage of those convictions.

Such musings seem magnified this week in the great divide between those who would celebrate the colonization of the Americas symbolized by Columbus Day here in the U.S. in contrast to the messages from indigenous people (who continue to pay the price) calling upon humanity to awaken to the consequences not just to their cultures but the very planet that we all share.

It takes courage to read and to think deeply about Nemonte Nenquimo’s message to the western world (click here).

It takes courage to listen to 2018 presentation (click here) that Nenquimo and other indigenous leaders made at the Bioneers conference and then to think deeply and do more than sign petitions.

I know this, because I am questioning how deep my courage runs to be better informed, to reflect AND then to ACT upon these and other issues of our time. I pray that it is deep enough and that I might earnestly adopt the words and spirit of a prayer that came my way this week.

It is said to be the Dalai Lama’s morning prayer, written by Shantideva, a Buddhist monk of the Mahayana tradition who lived around 700 AD. He was a devoted practitioner who authored the Bodhicaryavatara or Bodhisattva Way of Life. Thanks to Nick Polizzi and the folks at The Sacred Science for this uplift to my week!

Bodhisattva Prayer for Humanity

"May I be a guard for those who need protection

A guide for those on the path

A boat, a raft, a bridge for those who wish to cross the flood

May I be a lamp in the darkness

A resting place for the weary

A healing medicine for all who are sick

A vase of plenty, a tree of miracles

And for the boundless multitudes of living beings

May I bring sustenance and awakening

Enduring like the earth and sky

Until all beings are freed from sorrow

And all are awakened."

… Enduring Like Earth and Sky …

The Power of Our Thoughts

His Holiness, The XIV Dalai Lama

The history of humanity is, in some respects, the history of [human] understanding. Historical events, wars, progress, tragedies, and so on, all of these reflect the negative and positive thoughts of [humankind]. All the great personalities of history, the liberators, the great thinkers, all such people reflect positive thinking, whereas tragic events, tyranny, and terrible wars have resulted from negative thinking. Therefore the only thing that is really worthwhile is to increase the power and influence of positive thinking and to reduce the occurrence of negative thinking. If you let anger and hatred run loose, you are lost. And no sensible human being wants to be lost.  Tenzin Gyatso, The XIV Dalai Lama

Seventy years ago this day my consciousness accepted this vehicle to navigate life on planet earth. What a journey it’s been. What a journey it continues to be! What a journey it is in this moment!

Just over six and a half years ago (346 weeks, but who’s counting?) I began this weekly practice of sharing ideas, musings, challenges and such. I’ve written, though not published/shared, throughout the decades of my professional life, especially my almost 30 years as a coach. 

I share this to provide a context for the essence of today’s message, which was written almost two decades ago on September 13, 2001 when our country was gripped in shock, fear and grief as a result of the events two days earlier.  I can imagine that similar fear swept the country in the wake of the bombing of Pearl Harbor and in the depths of the Great Depression as well as other tragic events.  I find myself longing for leaders that utter positive words of conviction as Franklin D. Roosevelt did in his first inaugural address:  So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. (emphasis mine!)

Yet as I look deeply at my longing, I realize that I have a responsibility to go within. To find my own conviction, and to act from that alone as, like each of you, we navigate multiple new terrains. The Dalai Lama’s words above strengthen my belief in the power of our thoughts as the starting point that sets direction.

His wisdom echoes the message that I wrote just after 9/11. It’s title: Most Important Now is What We Think. Here’s what I said then and what I believe even more strongly today:

Our strength as a nation and as a worldwide community lies in our beliefs. Each of us contributes our individual thoughts to that belief. While governments will take the actions deemed appropriate and necessary, our individual thoughts are part of the collective consciousness that will set the direction. We will move either deeper into hatred and anger or out of conflict and into peace. Each of us has the opportunity by our thoughts and intentions to bring light into this darkness. By our thoughts we each have a role, a responsibility, to determine whether the responsive actions that are certain to come lead to a world of hope, peace and freedom or to revenge which fosters more hatred.

As individuals, our greatest challenge today and in the days ahead is to wake up, to become aware of and to choose our thoughts carefully. We need courage, stamina and time to go beyond our reactive anger and to explore what we believe, what we want for our country and for the greater global community of mankind of which we are a part.

How can you meet this challenge? First, don't get sucked into the drama and repetition of media reports. Take from the media information that you need to make intelligent decisions for yourself, your family, your business. Then turn the media off. Don't let anything outside of you determine how or what you will think. Give yourself time to be clear about your beliefs and your thoughts. Take time to go beyond your anger and the desire for revenge. Take time to go beyond even your thoughts and prayers of comfort to those most directly impacted by the events. Take time to have bold, courageous, clear thoughts about the good that may follow.

Each thought you think is a powerful thing. Today more than ever in recent history, is a time to become aware of that reality and to take responsibility for thinking thoughts that contribute to the peaceful world we all desire. The collective thoughts of all of us will establish the direction of the future. What thoughts will you choose?

Our opportunity as we navigate the current pandemic is to find the information we need to make decisions on a daily basis without getting hooked into the media fear factory. That requires not denying when we feel afraid, but rather acknowledging and working with our fear until we can put it to rest. The choices that will serve us best, individually and collectively, are those flowing from positive thoughts grounded in love and care, not fear.

We can do this, my friends. Indeed, we must.

I gain strength from all of nature, especially these mountains